


Not Surprised

by JadelynTate



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Captain America: Civil War (Movie) Spoilers, Gen, added Darcy, cause everything's better with Darcy, rewrite of a scene
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-07
Updated: 2016-05-07
Packaged: 2018-06-06 21:23:21
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 996
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6770443
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JadelynTate/pseuds/JadelynTate
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Rewrite a scene in Civil War.</p><p>Steve needed to get his suit back. So he called in a favor. Problem is, he didn't call the person everyone expected him to call.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Not Surprised

**Author's Note:**

> This is a rewrite of a scene because while it DOES make a certain amount of sense, what happens during it, while funny (Sam and Bucky!) kinda made me go... wait, what? Huh? When did THAT have time to develop? I hate off-screen stuff!

“I wish I could say I was surprised when I got the call but I'm no liar.” 

Steve winced, fully aware Sam and Bucky had gotten out the bug when Darcy had appeared instead of someone, well, different. 

He wasn’t an idiot—he knew Sam had been expecting Sharon. Steve couldn't ask her to do that though, especially given everything she'd already done for him. The less contact they'd had from here on out, the better off she'd be. He couldn't get Peggy's niece involved in this, no matter how much he could have used the help. 

“Thank you for this,” he told Darcy as she popped open the trunk. He tried ignoring the conversation behind him as Darcy went into a tirade about what she’d done to get his gear out to him. It seemed to have involved a lot babbling about Thor and possibly flashing some cleavage. 

“Who’s the dame?” Bucky asked behind them lowly. 

“Darcy Lewis,” Sam responded just as quietly. "She's one of the support staff for the Avengers."

“She's SHIELD?” 

“No.” That was Darcy, answering Bucky’s question. She snorted. “Like I’d ever agree to join them after they stole my iPod.” 

Steve sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. He didn’t have time for this. “Are you really going to start with the iPod again?” he asked, despite knowing she was. She never passed up an opportunity to complain about her missing device. 

“30 songs, Steven,” she said, picking up his shield and thrusting it at his chest with more force than he thought was necessary. He grimaced but grabbed it as she continued ranting. “30. Listened to exactly once before iPod Thief thought I could possibly be hiding alien secrets on it.” 

“You _were_ hiding alien secrets on it,” he couldn’t help needling her. She huffed at him. 

“A picture of naked Thor is hardly an alien secret!” 

Sam choked. 

“There are some I imagine would disagree, Doll,” Bucky said and Steve looked back at him in surprise. His best friend rolled his eyes and gave him a look. “I was in hiding, not ignorant of the world. I know who Thor is.” 

Darcy cackled. “And this right here?” she said, picking up Sam’s armor and thrusting it at him with less force than she’d given him his shield. “Is why I agreed to do this. I wanted to meet the man you keep calling 'me without boobs.'” 

“They going to come looking for you?” Sam asked as he hoisted his stuff in his arms. Steve was trying to avoid Bucky’s curious look. At Sam’s question, though, he looked down at her in concern. 

“They won’t find me,” she assured them. 

“You’re certain? Clint said you could stay at his place if you needed. They still don't know about it.” 

“While that’s sweet, I don’t do babies,” she shook her head. She waved a hand negligently. “Don’t worry about me, I’ve got it covered.” 

“You’re certain?” he persisted. Thor would kill him if something happened to Darcy because he got her involved…and that was after Erik got a hold of him. The scientist had become ridiculously protective of Darcy after it had come out Ian, her ex, had been HYDRA and was tasked with taking her out if need be. 

“You getting Wanda out?” she asked. He mentally groaned. That was one friendship he sometimes really wished had never developed. Darcy was a handful on her own, Wanda was a handful on her own. Put them together? He was lucky neither had aspirations to villainy (anymore). 

“She’s already with Clint,” he assured her. He really didn't doubt she'd try and get Wanda out herself if she thought she had to. 

“Then I’m certain,” she answered, satisfied. She suddenly scowled, poking his chest. “Though really, you all are being incredibly stupid.” 

“I’m aware,” he sighed. Still… ”Are you sure they won’t find you?” 

“Pretty sure,” she agreed with a quick smile. She threw the keys to the car she’d been driving at him. He caught them on instinct, frowning at her. She smirked. “You need a different vehicle. That cannot be good for any of you.” 

“You are officially my new favorite person,” Bucky told her solemnly. She smirked. 

She looked back at him. “Get going, no telling how long it’ll take for them to find you. I stole the car though so…” 

“Here,” he said, handing her the keys to the bug, which, coincidentally, was also stolen. At her look, he frowned. “You’ll need a ride.” 

“Already got one,” she said and with that, walked out from under the bridge. Steve watched her, confused, before suddenly realizing what her plan was. She didn’t think it would actually work, did she? As far as he knew, the gatekeeper only ever listened to Thor. 

He watched as Darcy glanced back at him. “Do me a favor, try not to actually kill any of the Avengers, kay? They might be acting like idiots but they’re my idiots. I’m the only one allowed to kill them.” Before he could reply, not that he even knew what to say to that, she looked up at the sky. “Heimdall?! I’m calling in that favor you promised me for that which shall not be named!”

“What is she—” Bucky began and then abruptly cut off when a prismatic light suddenly came down from the sky, engulfed Darcy, and disappeared with her. Bucky went silent. 

“I cannot believe that actually worked,” Sam muttered. Steve completely understood and agreed. There had to be a story for why Heimdall had listened. He really really hoped he survived all this to find out what it was. 

They all piled in the new vehicle and headed towards the rendezvous point with Barton and the others. It took about ten minutes listening to Sam mumble as he inspected his “bird costume” before Bucky finally spoke. 

“Steve?” 

“Yeah, Buck?”

“You know some weird dames, you know that?” 

“Just wait till you meet Jane.”


End file.
